I want to go back to the more innocent times. The times where I didn't have to worry about where I'd end up in a few years. The times where worrying about relationships was more about finding true love and less about keeping it true. I fucking hate being awake this late. I should be in bed, but I hate that room. It is so dark, and so  cold. It brings me nothing but ugly shit to think about. I woke up earlier because I had a dream a man walked into our bedroom with a bat waiting to bash our heads in while we slept. I know how things get me paranoid but in times where I'm extremely paranoid and stressed over relationship problems, I try and turn to friends and either they don't have the time or they don't know what to tell me. It doesn't matter whether we have friends. All one really cares about is having someone listen to them. The moment I try to do the talking, it's a very complicated matter. I'm extremely upset. Frantic over stupid little things. Making a big deal out of small insignificant things. I am indeed overreacting. It was confirmed. I am a confused 28 year old body rotting from within like a promising fruit carrying a worm inside. I just want my place in the world. If I can't have it, I will fucking leave!!! Everytime I play a great song, all I want is to be held. I don't want riches, I don't want nice things... I just want someone to love me equally.